Phil Dunphy

"I’m the cool dad, that’s my thang. I’m hip, I surf the web, I text. LOL: laugh out loud, OMG: oh my god, WTF: why the face." - Phil Dunphy

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

A Day in the Life of Laurie

                I roll over on to my side, feeling the after-sleep drowsiness creep through my body and the drool encasing my pillow. I reach over, finding the broad shoulders of Dan, and begin stroking the hair encompassing his earlobe. I chuckle at the fact that he refers to this part of his body as his “crown.” Dan turns his back to me, signaling his wish to become the little spoon in the next hour or so of cuddling. Of course I abide. I love my little bird.
            Our daily ritual continues and I slip off the covers to trudge to the bathroom. I cannot help myself from stopping in front of the mirror, analyzing my curvatures. Dang I have a rockin body. The offspring of Jon and I would have become the most attractive children in the world. Wow, that would make a great tweet. I write it down on a sticky note and post it on Dan’s toothbrush so I will not forget it. In the reflection of the mirror, snow drifts down from the sky outside the window. Another blizzard means another day in utter blackness all alone with my Dan. I will make sure to really ruffle his feathers this time around. From the corner of my eye an eerie green light protrudes from underneath the bathroom door. Rather than waking my Big Daddy Bird, I open the door to investigate. All of the sudden my head begins to spin, my insides clench and…

            “Begin with the body! DO THE MOTHER F#@!ING BODY FIRST!” I rub my eyes, attempting to find my bearings. Yet in all this confusion, I think I remember that voice, because I recall how I agreed with her in that, yes people should definitely do my body first. Hold on a second, I most assuredly know that voice. But how? My eyes finally adjust to the light and, sure enough, there I sit in front of the one and only, Ms. Serenksy.

            I try not to panic as I wonder how I could have travelled back to my junior year of high school. My mind races as I glance across the semi-circle to see the genius couple holding hands underneath their desks. Wow, nothing has changed. Even the same girl giggles in the end seat while the semi-Asian girl makes faces at her. Ugh, I wish Jon was here.

1 comment:

  1. Your beginning of your post Derek, surprised me with its level of intimacy. Moving past that; however, proved easy as I found the rest of your post humorous and your take on the prompt interesting as you write from the perspective of a character and feature other characters from novels we have read as well.