Phil Dunphy

"I’m the cool dad, that’s my thang. I’m hip, I surf the web, I text. LOL: laugh out loud, OMG: oh my god, WTF: why the face." - Phil Dunphy

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Bitter Sweet

            The AP English Student of the Month Award remains one of the most valued endowments in the school. At least I like to think this. As the year progresses, however, such a distinction becomes less…well distinct I suppose. The preposterous fact that no person may receive the award more than once parallels the same philosophy to that of my kindergarten soccer coach. Sure, many of my teammates found it entertaining to pick daisies as the ball rolled pass their ankles. Sure, none of the kids on the field could even spell scoreboard. Sure, most of the players on my team showed up week after week solely for the free, grape snowcone they received after the game. However, these actions should not diminish the fact that, when the game ended, one team lost and one team won. Yet my coach allowed these small factors to change the rules of the world. After the game, my coach assured us that “we were all winners,” even after a lost. When we won, I knew the exact same scenario happened on the opposing sideline. I figured that I, a responsible human being, would inform the players on the other team that in actuality, they were in fact losers and that their coach lied to them simply to make them feel better. I remember this happening one Saturday morning, while lining up to shake hands with the other team after the game. My coach taught us to go through the line and say “Good game” to each of the opposing players. Even though anyone with the slightest math background understood that my team won the game by five goals, I knew that the opposing coach had repeated the cursed statement to his players. So, I figured I would act as the better man and go through the line saying, “7-2. 7-2. 7-2” and so on and so forth. However, I learned to live through countless scenarios of “spreading the wealth” (although my mother demanding that I share my Skittles with another boy because he cried almost killed me). For this reason, I believe that I will persevere through the rest of the school year, with the rest of my fellow AP English Students of the Month Award winners, despite knowing the fact that we will never again win such an award. Therefore, I will attempt to live by the cliché, “If you can’t beat them, join them.” Although winners of this high honor will never again feel the suspense that comes during the drum roll before the announcement of the victor of the award, I urge ex-winners to set aside their distaste for the rules of the world and support their new brethren. For example, brainstorming photo ideas for the new hero would prove exceptionally helpful. As the year continues, I expect the photo shots of the monthly winners to become more and more creative. Despite Osgood’s past, visionary pose, jumpstarted with Hinman’s stellar mannequin performance, I think such a goal remains reachable.


  1. As a matter of fact, I feel great relief that I do not have to feel tortured for the rest of the year, waiting and wishing I would one day have the honor of earning AP English Student of the Month. However, having taken a less than adequate winner’s photo, people should not rely on me for creative help with such a thing. We past winner should encourage our fellow students to reach for the stars because they too could end up like one of us in the Winners' Circle with the highest honor one can recieve, an honor better than getting into college: AP English Student of the Month.

  2. I entirely agree with your childhood persona’s view on the distinct difference between winning, losing and the importance of knowing the difference. Competition drives success, and losing builds character. I noticed that difference while I taught swimming lessons this summer. The Chagrin Falls children, who so clearly have had their feeling nurtured their entire lives, acted overly-sensitive and immature when presented with a challenge. Conversely, the Chagrin Falls Park children, masters of sass and competition, took each challenge willingly. I believe that their mental strength allowed them to succeed in that manner.

  3. I think, especially as younger children, how people learn to deal with their successes and failures greatly impacts their lives. I agree with you that children should learn to handle the responsibility of their losses, rather than have their feelings overly soothed and comforted. However, I also believe that children need to learn, through some consolation, that their minor failures do not bring the end of the world. Only by finding the happy median between these two can kids develop into mature and successful people.